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OK, I want you to write one about a crazed gardener whose tomatoes, carrots, and squashes have pornographic shapes. She thinks she's pregnant with spaghettii squash twins. Photo to follow.

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Adelia Ritchie, PhD

Author of "The Accidental Expat: A Costa Rican Adventure", science lover, contributing editor at SalishMagazine.org, expat, seeking the interesting and unusual